Reflection 65¢

I was speaking to one of my brothers last night, I guess recapturing thoughts I’ve already had and trying to share them in the only way I know possible before my consciousness eats itself like an ouroboros. Anyway, I was trying to express my comfort at the fact that any digital relics I put together whilst I breathe I’m okay with (and fond of) the idea that they will decay, rot and be replaced by the relics of others.

We live on the floor of a forest. Nutrients cycle from generation to generation and hopefully in each specific moment a solution or set of events comes together (like atoms) that is appropriate for the time being expressed. The time may be joyful, it may be painful, it may be both or nothing at all… but everything has a right to the time at hand and nothing (and no one; myself included) has a right to the time in which they aren’t alive.

My trite phrasing is that the land is for the living and I hope this is a universal truth we can all acknowledge (of course once I pass what to do with my memory will be up to those that survive me (I don’t want it to weigh them down like a millstone but that’s not my right to decide)). And if I’m wrong and rights extend past the living then I’m okay with being wrong, it’s not up to me to write the fate of the universe, just to decide on the answers that make sense for me.

Anyway, back to the forest floor. The phrase I gave to my brother, he was telling me that I’ve been misguided about my place in the universe (of course he is right, and of course I’m allowed to be wrong) and I was trying to say it doesn’t matter (in a cosmic sense). If I’ve tried to be there for others as an expression of the suffering I chose for myself then that was my choice, if he sees my impact on society as being larger than I do then that’s okay too. Whatever the gap I leave in the canopy of the forest (big or small), with time it will close, with time other trees (or people) will fill those holes with whatever is hopefully appropriate and life will prevail. If I leave a big gap then I bear more responsibility whilst it closes, if I leave a smaller gap then the whole left will close quicker… Either way closing the gap wont be up to me, it’d be nice to be able offer the universe more of myself (from a selfish perspective) but if it doesn’t happen that’s ok too.

Life prevails. The arrow of time moves on, we all keep moving. If it all stops, if life stops, if the universe stops, if the simulation stops that would be a huge shame because then everything we’ve (life? humanity?) has learnt to hold dear (like knowledge sharing, effort, empowerment) would also be meaningless. I celebrate the march of life, I celebrate others moving on (from me and otherwise), I want to celebrate the opportunity of life that may have never existed.

Much love to whoever reads this <3

— LostLetterbox